It has been a quiet weekend, of sorts. Mostly trying to get accustomed to the trans-dermal pain patch. It makes mush of my mind but it knocks the pain down.
Tomorrow is my first day of radiation treatment. I have some trepidation. It will be another night of sleepy confusion while I contemplate what is happening and what is going to happen. I will be in treatment until early April. "In treatment", what a lovely misnomer for chemo and radiation treatment that is going to cost me my hair, some weight, and do devastating things to my immune system. All in the hopes of destroying that which would destroy me.
I am in the fight again, just not a real fist to fist, sword swinging, gun wielding fight. One that is decided behind the scenes by forces and chemicals I barely understand. In the end, if I win, it will be just as subtle. I will simply live and recover, I will grow my hair back and build my strength again. No knight in armor will go galloping past, no tromp down a celebratory avenue by brigades of soldiers with adoring members of the public waving flags and banners. Just me, coming home to live my life again with the ones I love. No drama, no accolades, not much of anything really, just more life. Not that I could ask much more. Just another quiet life in a city of hustle and bustle and people caring for their own lives.
I will make my life in amongst all that and carry on. With my projects and my way of doing things. I just have to get through until April and see how it goes.
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